Say not thou, What is the cause that the former days were better than these? for thou dost not enquire wisely concerning this.
–Ecclesiastes 7:10
The Lord blessed our home with three boys. Each one is unique. They are as individual as you can imagine, far beyond what I could have ever dreamed twenty-two years ago. My wife and I have treasured watching them grow up. Each stage has been like a mixture between a college class and a family vacation. They bring us joy every day, and at the ages of seventeen, nineteen, and twenty-one there is never a dull moment. Our oldest son, Kevin, is engaged to be married and finishing his senior year at Golden State Baptist College. Our middle son, Kyle, is a sophomore at GSBC and Eric, our youngest, is a senior in high school.
So much has changed in our relationship through the years. I remember coming home from work and playing with Legos on the floor, and then there was throwing a ball outside or playing hoops after dinner. As they grew older, our backyard was always the happening place, full of boys from all over the neighborhood. My wife would make cookies and lemonade and the starving mob would devour even the crumbs so that nothing was left. On summer days, we would take the entire crew to the park and play baseball for hours. We made some wonderful memories and we cherish every one.
However, in spite of the nostalgia, my wife and I agree that the best days are right now. It seems that we are more involved in our sons’ lives now than ever before. Our interactions are much more meaningful and have much greater depth. As our boys grow older, they are involved in more ventures and finding meaning and fulfillment in life individually.
When they were small, I thought that soon they wouldn’t need us, but while they are largely independent, they need us now even more than they did before. We don’t play Legos or hide-and-go-seek any more, but we have even more fun than we did back then.
If you have young children, I’m sure there are times that you feel overwhelmed and wish you could get a break. That is understandable. But don’t allow yourself to start wishing they were grown and gone. Enjoy the time you have with them where you are along the journey. If your kids are nearly grown, you may find yourself wishing you could go back and tuck them in at night just one more time. Solomon’s admonition should be enough to convince us that that attitude isn’t healthy. You can’t go back there anyway. And besides, you’re embarrassing everyone with all of that sappy talk. Enjoy the part of the journey that God has given you today. It is really the only day you have.
Now, I’ve got to go fire up the grill. These guys eat a lot nowadays and we’re going to have some great family time together!
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